The Carrot or the Whip..?

Miss Sassy, me, Dita vonTeese o Tweety Swenson 27 of july 2010

Last week I decided to quit as mentor inWorldz. I have worked as a volunteer almost a year now. I started mentoring or as a “shadow mentor” about when i was a week in inWorldz and became mentor some weeks later. I was maybee a bit more experienced than some other people right from start because i came from Opensim, not just Second Life so I was used to certain open sim glitches. But eventually I felt I had enough. But no shadow on the founders, they are awesome.

Advice; be careful to address an experienced mentor and “bash” her when she just has been working alone with 3 new residents at the same time under stress. She may not respond well to that. Instead, begin with the “reward” as “you are doing great, good work” etc and after that, if you really feel its necessary that is, bring up the issue. Its even better if you can reward her and wait with your critique until next day. This is common psychology. I dont work for free if it ceases to be fun and im just left with a zillion rules and watch dogs around me, simple as that. Dont make it too big, we dont work in a nuclear plant

In real life I work full time for money. The money are my “reward” and the boss can criticize me as I still get my “reward”. If you have a volunteer situation its different. You are dealing with a person who gives you several hours of her private time and works without payment for you. And without any other benefits either. If you forget that, you will maybee eventually have problems getting new volunteers. Or you get desperate and take anyone and the quality will detoriate.

The founders has always been great with us mentors. Its not that easy to get people to work as volunteers, they know that. But the small “popes” should maybee learn to choose their “battles”…

So what did this (new)”sr” Mentor (yes she is “younger” in IW than me, she came from SL and rezzed in iw in dec 2010 and her first name starts with J) do after “bashing” me because i invited a NR to Magellan event group (a group of about 50 sims that arrange events in a lot of different clubs on those sim. Different owners.)? She removed me from her friendlist without notice… Mature? I didnt argue with her what so ever so there was no cause for drama. I was too tired to argue after the intense work I just had with several NR at the same time.

So thats why i decided to publish this. I had to vent because this mentoring has been important to me. I mostly tries to avoid drama, but this time I dont feel like making it easy for this person. When you have a mentor in front of you that are saiying she is going to quit after a year of voluntary work, regardless of why, what to do? You should thank her for her work and all time she dedicated to the grid. Not just remove her from your friendlist. Is this too much to ask?

Im not angry, its more like a sad feeling inside. Are all the work I´v done for inWorldz been in vain? Worth nothing in the end? I admit this sucks big time as im beginning to regret all hours I spent working here now………

I got my reward from thankful New residents I helped along this past year. I will miss them. The more than 400 “New residents” i have on my friendlist are of course still welcome to im me with questions. Im forever yours <3

Love, peace and I wish all new residents a happy rezzday! =)

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8 Comments to “The Carrot or the Whip..?”

  1. Well I am absolutely certain that your work as a mentor has not been a waste of time in any way.
    This is the one major flaw with the mentoring system as it was found in SL too, namely, that a few mentors are idiots/immature/fools …. luckily they are a tiny minority, it’s just unfortunate that one of them got to you and was rude and immature.

    I still think it is probably the best system going, even though this type of stupidity can happen. I would suggest you talk to Elenia about this.

  2. soror, thanks <3 <3 <3, and i agree. The mentor system is working well. But Entropia uses a sort of Bots instead and actually its working very well! The bots explains stuff about different matters in the game and then gives you tasks and landmarks and stuff. This is awesome because they are always there. you can always reach them. In a huge grid like SL its maybee hard nowadays to reach all newbies with mentors. I dont know? Personally the bots worked for me even if they are a bit of a bore :)

  3. I am so sorry that that happened to you Mera. I can imagine how it must have felt to you. You are a GREAT mentor, I have seen you in action many times. Mentoring can be fun , but very stressful and it isn’t something that works well when you have folks in charge who are not great managers. I had to take a break from mentoring before I went crazy.(I am still unsure if I want to continue after the summer break.) I did it for the joy of helping new folks enter the world and no other reason. I took it very seriously. Perhaps, I shouldn’t have …. It felt to me like a bad stressful job— all work, no reward and a immature boss to boot. Fortunately, things have changed a bit and the person who soured it for me is no longer a Sr. mentor. I know that the founders have a lot on their plates but IMHO the mentoring program needs more help.
    There are over 400 Inworldz NR’s and lots more old ones who think that what you did was worth it. Give it some more thinking… Perhaps a break from it and a chat can repair your spirit. Hugs!

    • Bebe; huggsss <3<3<3 I know you have been through this too… we should only do things that makes us feel good in these worlds. This is not rl work, its our own time, for ourselves and we have to take good care of it. You are a great mentor too! I dont know if its possible to go back. Ppl says you cant do that, you have to move on. Time will tell…

  4. Mera… I’m truly sorry to hear about this and I know how hard it is for volunteers to stay feeling bright and passing on the good vibes when they feel unappreciated. It’s a tough job and many take it for granted. I’ll always cherish the times you helped me out and you’ll always be my personal favorite mentor! Hugs <3

    • Thanks a lot Boudica <3<3<3 it means a lot for me to hear this.

      And sorry all for i had some strange setting that made it difficult to comment if you didnt have a WordPress id *facepalms*

  5. I’m sorry to hear this :/ I know you’ve been a great mentor, I’ve seen you mentor a few times and I truly admire your patience.

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